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Announcing “sEAd The Future”: Effective Sperm and Egg Bank
Good news everyone, as of today, April 1st, we are announcing our new effective charity “sEAd The Future.”
It is occasionally complained by those concerned with effectiveness and altruism that those concerned with effectiveness and altruism do not have nearly enough children in order to create more effective altruists. They are just too busy being effectively altruistic to concern themselves with such petty matters.
Yet in the long run, if those who are most effectively altruistic have less kids, this could lead to a gradual but steady decline in effective altruists, as shown by this graphical model of the situation:
(sorry, Chat GPT is not perfect at spelling yet)
Fortunately, we are predicting that our new charity has an approximately 7.5982%[1] chance of solving this problem (a "hits based" opportunity) by simply collecting sperm and egg donations from existing effective altruists, then paying people who we think will be in the top .1% of really great parents to raise them in an environment with lots of altruism and effectiveness to maximize results[2].
Our critics claim that our project may not succeed because AI timelines and regulator scrutiny, to which we reply, maybe you are overconfident about your AI timelines, epistemic humility much?, it is totally plausible that AI will take a super long time or not happen at all. And, we have a dedicated policy team to convince regulators that this is a really good idea.
Currently seeking funding for this project, at present we are operating via collecting samples in the attic and freezing them until further notice, $100 million would allow us a modest salary and to hire some bio scientists to do the science-y parts for us, maybe even some genetic engineering for super-babies with even more effectiveness and altruism.
If you’d like to mail us your samples, please first submit an application in the comments section (we want to be fully transparent and open to ensure moral integrity), saying why you think you are effective and altruistic. If we post a smiley face in response, you have been selected, high-five! If we post a frowny face, you have been rejected and are discouraged from continuing to pursue a career in effective altruism.
Calculations in the appendix, which is not being released yet due to potential info risks, we are currently in the process of creating a prediction market to decide if benefits of publicly releasing this information outweigh the risks
Research has shown that rats who grew up with lots of toys and lots of other rats as playmates are shown to be happier and healthier or something, versus rats raised in solitary confinement with nothing to play with but a water bottle filled with heroin. This just goes to disprove the “rats on heroin” criticism of hedonium. Anyways.
Surely, from this research we can extrapolate that children raised in an effectively altruistic environment will grow up to be effectively altruistic, hence confirming our theory of change with high confidence.
