I guess the first question is do you like academia? Or do you like research? The two aren't always the same. Personally, you couldn't get me to do a job in academia if you paid me - which is funny because they barely pay anyone! I love research, I love complex cutting-edge stuff, but I hated hated hated academia. I never thrived there. The corporate environment, however, has been my natural space. It may be the same for you - have you tried different types of organisation? I can tell you from experience that research-centric corporate life is much slower paced and more secure than academia, with the downside of less creative freedom during work hours (until you get to mid level).

Honestly more than anything it sounds like you just maybe need a rest. People think a rest is a career-killer but it absolutely isn't. And even if it was, it'd be much less of one than a burnout is. Maybe take a couple months to decompress - though I understand that financing such a rest is rarely easy.

I do a lot of hiring outside of academia and honestly a lot of your major worries are something I don't even look at in a CV anyway. Don't feel like you'd sabotaged or blown anything because you haven't. Even within Academia, we all have our stuff. You'd be surprised how many well-known academics have had 'wobbles' that aren't public knowledge.

Feel free to inbox me if you need more detailed advice. I'm not US based so unlikely to be useful for specifics, but always happy to hear spitballed ideas :)

 

You’ve had a rough time with your studies. You started with decent grades, but some challenges led to lower GPAs and missed chances for research. Now, as you finish your Ph.D. and teach, it’s important to set small, manageable goals. Getting help from vocational rehabilitation is a great step to find work that fits your skills. You've got this